I enjoy fieldwork because it allows me to see my theories on language, labeling, access, and support brought to life by people. While in school, we can only theorize on those ideas, but seeing concepts in practice in a classroom watching how people navigate their day and so much more excites me. The small details interest me. I would like to know who feels confident enough to speak, who is hesitant to answer a question, what sort of assistance is appropriate and what help makes someone feel less invisible.
I think I understand this on a different level because I understand what it means to go through school and life using a different language than my native language. With a different language, one can appear to be less sure, less confident, and overall less capable. This interests me, and I enjoy knowing how teachers extend past this to see more beyond their English capability and how students gain the other things they deserve.
Anxiety for me is more about the practical side of things. I like to know what I need to do, and I care about doing things correctly. For now, I will not be able to tell what my host educator wants me to do or how actively involved I should be. I want to figure out what's the right amount of active involvement and how I can overall help the classroom the best.
There's one big question I have for my host educator, and that is the hope they have for my development in the classroom throughout the internship. I care more about the role I hope to achieve in the classroom, and less about the tasks I will be assigned. I would like to get to know the classroom so much, that walking through those doors one day, I won't feel like a guest in someone else's home.